So, by now everyone knows the catastrophe that is the BP oil spill. They’ve tried many things and even named solutions James Bondesquely “Top Kill”, but it still failed. Millions of oil is going to waste and the environment is all going downhill. This slippery situation can be solved in three easy ways.
1) Wait for a Time Machine
This is the lazy way out. Rather investing money in trying to stop it now, invest it in time travel R&D. If every goes well, then we might have a time travel machine much sooner than expected. Go back in time and stop the failure. Success! AND we now have time machines. Win-win situation.
2) Make it a Free-for-All all you can scoop oil buffet
I’m sure there are mechanics and other oil companies crying themselves to sleep at night, because of this oil spill. I say, BP should let anyone be able to go and harvest their own oil out of the sea. Yeah, it might get a bit messy, but it is for the greater good.
3) Operation Plumbing
This is probably a no-brainer, but other oil companies should just start pumping more oil… and quick in fact. Especially those on the other side of the globe. This will equalize the oil quantity in the world, putting less pressure on BP’s vein. This might be a potential loss for BP, but I’m sure they have some Chinese derricks that just have to pump harder.
Honourable Mention: GM Animals
This plan was scrapped for ethical reasons, but BP should also invest money in genetically modifying fish that can digest oil.
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This kid is the business. Every two year old in some country is envying this little blighter. They wish their parents were as callous… I mean cool, about his smoking habits. Like he smokes two packs a day. Little dude is a puffing machine. And he has already developed brand loyalty, smoking only a preferred brand.
He is probably getting some mad hugs from chicks his age, making all the other toddlers jealous. The dudes his age, probably either have to start smoking to fit in, but their parents will stop them, but they’ll probably rebel and listen to some Led Zep. Perhaps break some toys.
This smoking kid is cool beyond his years. Peer pressure ain’t got nothing on him. He MAKES peer pressure. A leader and a visionary. Live fast, die young. Chick dig the badass vibe. This kid has got life already figured out, that’s probably why the parents don’t worry.
I don’t even want to start talking about the older toddlers, whom are probably just starting school. They will feel so weak and conservative. This smoking kid will have a job by 4, mid-life crisis by 7 and be in the grave by 10.
(via @chrisdevilliers)
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London, a multi-cultural haven, has imported two aliens to become their mascots for the 2012 olympics. They seem to be from some gangsta galaxy, or have studied too much music videos trying to fit in. However, there were some concerns about Twitter users, even Simon expressed his concern on Twitter.
Are they really aliens or are those costumes really so good? Hypothetically speaking if they were aliens, then their skins are really well created, as if they evolved to one day fool humans. Wenlock and Mandeville, are also odd choices for names. Yeah, yeah, silly back story about girders and dropping metal, but really Wenlock and Mandeville? I vote we change the names to ET and Invader Zim. At least they are somewhat more relateable than droplets of metal.
And what’s with those eyes. Are we supposed to be happy with that? The aliens should’ve realised we are not cycloptic beings. Time will tell, if this impending alien import will go down well, for now, I’m highly skeptical of their origin and purpose. Just don’t bring your kids close. Nightmares will be had.
(via MFM926)
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If you’ve seen the movie 2012, you will know about Earth Crust Displacement. The devastating event that shifts continents left right and center due to some poles or something. How do magnets work? No-ones knows, but they’re definitely cataclysmic. The news on TV has just confirmed this. South Africa is now placed at South America. However, confused comments are popping up saying that some are still stuck in Africa.
I’m feeling nothing so far. My laptop is still is fine. I’m typing with speed to get the news out there. I spilled a glass of juice earlier today, was that a result of 2012? People need to calm down. I called a leading scientist and he explained after a using a fruit metaphor he claims that this is what Earth will look like within 48 hours.
Getting your families close. This is a dire time. But most of all, now is the time to cheat on Foursquare.
(via @FourFourTwo)
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Time is losing it’s hold on journalism. It’s100 most influential people list is the business. It inspires me and also puts people on my “to rob” list, however, what is this?
Least Influential People of 2010?
What the… this doesn’t make sense at all. It should’ve been named, Time Magazine’s Least Influential People in Influential Positions Who Didn’t Have As Much Influence As Expected. Julius Malema features in that? How? He darned have some influence under some groups. And Google Buzz? Huh, it’s not a person.
What about that guy… you know the guy, who nobody knows about, that guy you thought you saw once, but it was in your peripheral vision and looked like someone familiar, but in fact was just a dude. What about them Time? Are they on your list of Least Influential People of 2010? If I didn’t have this blog, I would’ve considered myself for the position of Least Influential People of 2010.
What’s next for Time? Will they keep slipping up like this… it’s not even a small error, they knew this will spark controversy amongst the people who nobody knows of, but then again, they’d be no threat… since yeah… they have no influence and all. Well played Time. Well played. Can’t wait for next year’s Most Average Influential People of 2011.
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I’m a big fan of Archie Comics… not so much today, ’cause they cost a fortune here in South Africa, but I used to read them cover to cover when I was in primary school. It has now come to my attention that Archie comics will get a gay character. Now, I’m kinda in two camps (ha, get it?) on this one. Firstly, yeah, freshen up the series. Archie Comics has got one of the weirdest canons ever. They’re stuck in high school forever. Feels like a Twilight Zone episode and they go through the same Christmas (+ other holidays) every year, yet they never finish school. So, please yeah, introduce a new character. It’s one step in the right direction.
Secondly, why? Everyone is becoming so PC lately. Apparently, Veronica will fall in love with the gay dude, while he bats her. lol fail. I really don’t mind gay characters, but introducing one for the sake of new social standards feels like selling out, and by the way, in my opinion Jughead is a closet gay. Who runs away from chicks? C’mon!?
(thanks for the tip @Nico_Gous)
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This is not a PC vs MAC debate. I’m not a fan of PC and I’m not a fan of MAC. I just use a PC, because it’s like religion: the one you’re born with is the one you’ll probably remain loyal too. My parents bought a PC, thus I use a PC. However, Apple is also awesome. Really innovative products and stylish too. Now Apple’s newest product, the Magic Mouse, has been revealed… Can someone say “teh lulz?”
First off, Magic Mouse. Yes. Let’s say that again. Magic Mouse. Magic. Mouse. If you abbreviate it, it is almost the sound everyone makes before bursting out in laughter: mmmm? It’s the silliest name I’ve heard since the Afrikaans translation of Dumbledore: Dompeldorius [if I'm not mistaken?]. Alas, names aside, the mouse looks cool. It’s ridiculously sleek: Trinity-from-the-Matrix kinda sleek.
However, design isn’t everything. I read some of the descriptions what Mouse the Magician this Magic Mouse can do. Swipe things and all that jazz. Go look at the official Apple page. However this particularly boggled me: the screen zoom.
Isn’t that just what a normal mouse wheel can do? I can also enlarge things while holding the control key. It’s like the weakest disguise for a mouse wheel ever. Magic Mouse has to be experienced before I’m convinced of the faux wheel-less mouse. I bet they called it magic, ’cause it magically makes millions of Mac owners drool. MAGIC MOUSE! REJOICE!
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After a really lazy vacation me and Simon got up early for Coke Zero Fest this year. With a super psyched attitude we quickly loaded some petrol and off we went… or so we thought. After a quick whistle by the joggie we realized we had a puncture. Luckily they gave a speedy service and we switched the tyres and off we went. The venue was really easy to find, and oh my word was it an amazing venue. So beautiful: mountains and lush green scenery. However, to our sad realization when we arrived at 10:40 Die Heuwels Fantasties were already at it. They stated on their Facebook fan page they’d only start at 11h30. Slightly pissed we hastily found parking and ran to stage.
Me and Simon got general admission tickets, however the view was not that bad. Die Heuwels Fantasties played four songs (we saw only four) and were done. It was slightly disappointing. There were still nobody in the crowd and it felt like a rehearsal before the crowd got in. A quick one two and we’re off. However, I love their music: going to see them again this week. I feel like they need a much more sweaty, small, close and loud singing type of crowd to really get the effect. To my surprise, Fred, who played guitar in the now defunct, Die Helde, and is now currently jamming in Thieve, played drums for Die Heuwels Fantasties. The bassist from Bed on Bricks also lend a hand on the bass. Jack Parow also made an appearance. What a legend dude, but he forgot the second verse of “Die Vraagstuk” and repeated the first verse again.
Next was Foto na Dans. They are my favourite band from South Africa and again the meagre crowd did not do them justice. They need more people singing in unison. They sang to an empty golden circle, while I was yearning from the outside trying to get nearer to the stage and feel the vibe. Alas, it did not work out. They however did give away a free guitar from Marshall Music valued at R15000. That was awesome. Another awesome trick Le-Roi (lead singer) pulled was to go up to the railings and sing with the crowd on “Vergeet van My”. The front man of Flux in Motion was in the crowd and harmonized with Le-Roi. Was pretty cool.
Next was Cassette. Unfortunately, I went to get some beers and stood in line for the Guitar Hero competition (which I completely bummed at). However, they seemed to throw a very cool show. The front man has a really sneaky personality. It’s good.
Zebra and Giraffe took the stage after Cassette. They really were the highlight of the South African bands. I wish Foto na Dans had that crowd for such a stage. They totally ripped it. With such ease they cruised through their set and looked the part as well. These guys can really go far. Almost within a year they catapulted to this stage. I wish them luck. Greg is a genius. Their sound is meant for such a stage. I’ve seen them in smaller gigs, but this totally suit them better.
The Dirty Skirts were up next. Unfortunately, my stomach was grumbling like crazy and could not experience the whole set. However, they played classics such as, “Homewrecker” and “Feeling the Pressure”. The front man is really funny and they also went into an impromptu jam session. Gutsy move on such a big stage, but they pulled it off.
aKing was up next. I was expecting more from them. Their set was brilliant, but something was lacking. It needed more oomph. Safe as Houses, however, will always remain a sing-a-long classic. Eager to seem perform again this week. Like Die Heuwels Fantasties, the crowd makes this band.
Panic! At The Disco then arrived on stage as the first international act of the night. It was better than I expected, however, not really amazing either. Brendon Urie’s voice was suprisingly good, as I’ve seen horrendous live shows on Youtube and award shows. They mixed up their set from their first and second album.
Then Snow Patrol came on. Wow! I was totally blown away. I was not expecting this. First off I got to give frontman, Gary Lightbody, the biggest kudos ever. I’ve not seen someone smile on stage as much as he did. It really rubs off on the crowd if the performer seems to absolutely enjoy what he is doing. They sang classics such as “Run”, “Chasing Cars”, “You’re all that I Have” and “Hands Open”. The crowd sang along to almost every song while the sun went down: spectacular stuff. Definitely my favourite at this year’s Coke Fest.
Oasis then came on at around 20h00… and with a resounding meh. I’m not a fan, however, it’s an injustice to leave them hanging. We just waited for Wonderwall and went. They just don’t have the same charisma that Snow Patrol had.
In conclusion, this was a great festival, however it’s not going to beat last year’s epic line-up, but it did have the best organization by far. I literally went to bar and slapped my cash on the counter and got a beer. There were no queues at the toilet and minimal waiting time for the food. It was really a top-notch festival experience. Eager to see what they do for next year!
If you want to check some videos I took on my cellphone. Visit my Qik page at http://www.qik.com/nieldlr
Simon’s 2nd opinion:
My head hurts, because of the sun. I remembered sunscreen, but there’s only so much you can do. So my quick recap. It was awesome! The best local band line-up by far. Getting better and better!
Panic was better than I expected. The last song (can’t remember the name of it), had everyone boogying. ‘Twas fun.
As Niel mentioned, Snow Patrol kicked ass. Really great! Wow.
I’m not a fan of Oasis and while Liam is a tad arrogant, I have to give it to them. You don’t gig so long without knowing what works. It worked pretty well. :). Wonderwall was cool.
And finally. BEST VENUE ever. The scenic mountains with the impeccable service. Thinking back on the 1st Cokefest, it’s astounding how much they’ve approved. Great job! Looking forward to next year!
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]]>Apparently he had rejections issue and went on a vengeance rampage. Now I for one am happy; they have not blamed video games.
He posted a note in a social networking site (shotgun it’s Facebook!) explaining how he is “too selfish to leave and let you keep living”. He was rejected by a lover. It seems like a final plea of “hey, take notice of me… please?”, but he opted for the “Damn you! TAKE NOTICE OF ME! I’m gonna shoot you!” method, instead of the “I’d rather go see a psychiatrist” method.
However, I give Dimitris credit for his style as “fellow students and college staff described the gunman as a loner who favored black clothing and long overcoats.” Go Matrix!
And now more Breaking News has reported another kid has gone crazy in Michigan. He has already killed two people according to the CNN update. However, luckily it’s under control.
Why is this getting so frequent all of a sudden? I’m going on a limb here and suggest that this is the first Y-Gen’ers getting out into the big world and realizing it’s not like how they envisioned it.
Simon’s 2nd opinion:
Good pun with the shotgun! It is alarming how frequent it is becoming, but what has Y-Gen’ers have to do with it? I think lots of children grew up and realized the world isn’t how they envisioned it. I just think that the current media in our age give these kids an audience. In the past, these kids would’ve thought it was their problem since they didn’t have outlets. Now they go and think, “shit, it’s society’s problem why I am this way.” Don’t you think?
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